Thursday, March 1, 2012

My Reading Was Felled By A Couch

I haven't been able to hold a book in four days. Why? Long story short, it was a couch....

...well, actually, it began with my dog (who wrenched my left arm viciously in an attempt to reach his "girlfriend" - a german shepherd with attitude who would just as soon gut him as let him have his way with her). I flew about 3 ft. through the air, managed to land on my feet and dig in before he dragged me across the lawn. The result, though, was the muscles in both my upper and lower arm were wrenched. Still, this isn't the first time little Leo has done this, so I wasn't worried. It would heal.

Then I got the call that my new couch was coming.While this was exciting news, it meant I had to tackle the family room - and the removal of the old couch, chair, footstool and computer desk. It was fairly easy to get most of the furniture outside. Yes, it hurt carrying my end of them with my arm, but I still wasn't worried. I've moved heavier things. 

And then I had to move the old computer desk. And that's when disaster struck. I'm pretty sure the damn thing weighs four billion pounds. Not only that, the only way to get a grip on it is by the overhang on the desktop - which means carrying it with my fingertips. I was in tears by the time we got it outside, and pain was shooting down my arm all the way to my middle finger. 

(Let me inject at this point that I have carpal tunnel syndrome. I've had surgery on my left hand and I'm not supposed to carry anything more than 20 lbs. - hah, like that's back to the story...)

Stupid, evil computer desk. 

By the next morning, despite copious amounts of advil, I couldn't lift, bend, twist or in any way move any part of my arm without letting out a little scream. I couldn't hold anything (my book, phone, DS, ereader) or type on my computer. I was in agony. 

But here's the good news. A week or so ago, I saw this device on Amazon. It was the deal of the day. And its called a Prospera - a device that has electrodes and sends current through you to ease muscle pain. I bought it for my hubs, who has a bad back - although I expected it would turn out to be crap. But, for $25 (on sale from $100), I knew I would probably end up giving it to kiddo to "hack" (he loves taking apart electronic devices and using them creatively.) 

It arrived yesterday. After four days of unbearable excruciating pain, I had nothing to lose. 

I hooked that puppy up to my upper arm first. I spent the first few minutes squealing as my brain tried to come to terms with my deliberately sending a electric current through part my body. My fingers twitched with each pulse. My brain was telling me it hurt, but it honestly didn't - in fact it tickled. And then the most amazing thing happened ...

... the mucles relaxed. The fucking thing actually worked!!! Four days of excruciating pain relieved in 15 minutes by a strange little device. Unfuckingbelievable! So, I'm back to normal. And I can use my arm again without screaming. Yay.

I'm currently half way through A Perfect Blood by Kim Harrison. Its (as usual) a fantastic book. Now I can finally go finish it.

BTW, the best thing about the Prospera device is the manual which advises you not to attach it to your head or your privates - heh - I'm assuming they don't want you to fry your brain or stick those electrodes to your sensitive parts....cause they don't feel so good when you peel them off!

1 comment:

  1. I'm glad you figured out how to make your arm work without pain again. Yesterday morning I wrenched my neck by turning too quickly to the left. Thank God for those neck things you can heat up or freeze!